as a kid, it was an impossible task to pull me out of the water. whether it was a chlorinated hotel pool, a sprinkler in someones yard, a seaweed slathered lake, or the embryonic ocean itself. My parents would tiredly protest at sundown with their patience steadily thinning, as they repeatedly attempted to lure me out. when i grew up and discovered my moon was in pisces, my affinity for the stuff started adding up- a fish simply doesn’t function out of water.
whenever i was in the ocean, i would intentionally challenge it. i would cry out for bigger waves, for more force, for a real display of power. once or twice it answered and would send me somersaulting under sandy, salty waves for longer than i could bare. once or twice it felt sharply to close to death, upon emerging and gasping for air. i would finally relent after having moments like those, returning back to my cancerian senses- thinking perhaps its safer on land and in the comfort of the mini van.
but the pisces side of me has always wanted to taste oblivion- to dissolve, to disintegrate, to depart, to die. that’s what the sign does, after all. it throws us like a stone into the deepest of depths, asking us to feel just how faint the line is between bliss and danger, between boundary and boundlessness, between me and you. we’ve all known the safe and soothing comfort of the bubble bath and we’ve all felt the powerful currents in open water. water can heal and baptize just as it can destroy and dissolve.
pisces is represented by two fish swimming in opposite directions, bound entirely at the tail. ultimately, pisces is two sides of the same coin. liz greene talks about pisces being both “the saint and the sinner, the victim and the redeemer”. if they continue to tug at each others tails, of which they co-own, they’ll find the divide between only stretches. in order for these twin fish to ultimately get anywhere, they need to compromise and surrender to the tide.
rather than challenge the ocean’s godliness, let yourself float to it’s top to feel it. rather than criticize, deny, or ignore the unimaginable depths of your feelings and connection to humanity- let yourself sink in and observe. it’s no wonder pisces is the end of the zodiac, where we all return to the source of life, asking for our souls to be accepted, flaws and all.